Sunday, August 22, 2010

The Value of Self-Worth

During the past 2+ years that Phil and I have been together, I have seen such a tremendous growth in both of us. We have grown in love, maturity, and in our walks with the Lord. There are times where we've clung to each other for support and have clung to God even more.

I have seen Phil grow from working at a retail chain store to starting his career. He struggled with finding the right job and moving forward. His specialized degree made it difficult to start a career and the fact that he graduated when the economy took a dive added to delay. Even with his job status as "temporary" (until we find out that it's permanent...keep the faith!) he still has shown so much maturity and it makes me love him even more.

To say that I've just "grown" would be an understatement. I feel like a completely different person now. When we first started dating I felt like an emotional wreck pretty much all.the.time. My stress levels would sky rocket and consume me leaving me to feel like a train wreck. I had been hurt in the past and, despite thinking I was "over it", I learned that it was deeper than I had thought.

Having a man by my side that loves me unconditionally has helped tremendously. He is constantly praying that God will make him the man that he needs to be for me. It was difficult, but over the past few months I have been able to get past so many of the deep issues that were hurting me for so long. The feelings of worthlessness are gone and I feel like I am valuable.

Now, I know what I want and am more decisive. I may still change my mind, but it is because I'm growing as a person and feel more comfortable in who I am. My desire for things of the past is gone and I want things that will continue to build me into a confident, mature woman. I thank God for helping me to grow and for giving me a man who never gives up on me and makes me want to be a better person.

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